How To Keep Your Marriage Strong When Planning For A Baby

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Getting pregnant is exciting, and there’s so many more happy moments to look forward to. Even though it’s tempting to want to solely focus on the baby, you and your partner can’t forget about each other in the mix. Do what’s in your power to keep connecting and supporting one another.

There are suggestions and guidelines to follow as you plan, but you’re a unique couple and will also have to work to figure out what works and doesn’t work for you as a unit. Put each other at the forefront of the process and keep an open dialogue about all that’s going on. See how to keep your marriage strong when planning for a baby.

Educate yourselves Together

The best way to combat fear is to equip yourself with knowledge. Get on the Internet and start reading about what happens when you’re 12 weeks pregnant and what you can expect. You can find out more about your baby’s development and size, and how your body’s changing and what symptoms to expect as the mother-to-be. The more you learn about what’s going on in the various stages of your pregnancy, the more at ease the both of you will feel. This will hopefully lighten the mood and cause less tension between the two of you.

Plan Date Nights

Just because you’re pregnant, it doesn’t mean you can’t go out and have fun. Make it a point to plan date nights where the two of you reconnect and participate in a fun activity. Put them on the calendar, so there aren’t any excuses about forgetting or not wanting to. Once you’re engrossed in whatever it is you’re doing, all of your other cares in the world should dissipate during the time you’re together. Kick back, relax, and appreciate your time together before the baby arrives.

Treat yourselves

Whether it’s going out with the girls and the guys separately or getting a couple’s massage, treat yourselves on a consistent basis. This is a great way to reduce stress and remember that your health and happiness matters too. Make this the time you splurge on yourselves or each other and don’t feel bad about it. Pick what you want to do ahead of time and get it on the calendar, so you don’t let it slide. You’ll be glad you did once the baby arrives, and you’re extremely busy caring for your newborn.

Talk about your Concerns

Instead of bottling up your feelings and trying to deal with your worry on your own, open up and talk about your concerns. Sit down together at dinner or on the weekends and lay it all out on the table. Go over each stressor, why it’s bothering you and brainstorm solutions or ways to deal with it as a couple. Leave it open to discussing worries about the baby coming and your marriage. This quiet time together is a great opportunity to be there for each other and help one another deal with a hectic, yet exciting time.

Share Responsibilities

Don’t put all of the responsibilities on the shoulders of one person. Make a list and agree to what each of you is going to be assigned as your to-do list. Talk about priorities and help one another put the list in order of most to least important. Splitting up the duties will make you both feel better about getting it all done and that you’re able to be there for each other, which should bring you closer together.

Focus on the Positives

Negativity and a bad attitude has the potential to make this an unpleasant time for the both of you, when it’s supposed to be special for everyone involved. Focus your time and energy on what’s going right and all of the positives you have in your life. Talk about them, reinforce them, and share your gratitude with each other every day. Of course you’ll have to deal with obstacles and roadblocks, but don’t let them stop you from remembering what really matters and all you have to look forward to. Check in with each other periodically to encourage one another to keep an optimistic outlook.


Knowing a baby is on the way is a big deal and may make you feel a little apprehensive at times. Don’t let these worries and concerns get in the way of nurturing a solid marriage. Know that you’re in this together and that nothing’s going to stop you from getting through it as a couple in love. This is how to keep your marriage strong when planning for a baby.  

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